Last night as I was wheeling to a restaurant to meet my wife after a long day at work and school I had one of the closest calls of my life. I was crossing Pine St. in westerly direction at the corner of Pine & Fir around 8:30 pm. I was wheeling through the intersection on the south side of 4th Ave. Having just passed in front of an idling dark blue minivan, I began to enter the other half of the lane. A fraction of a second later a huge, armored bank truck heading west turns South off of 4th Ave, onto Pine. I just noticed this hulking steel beast in my periphery and stopped in my tracks. A nanosecond later, I realized that he was not seeing me nor was he slowing down. I was too short – invisible under his high bumper and hood. Time as I perceived it slowed to a crawl. I began to back up as quickly as I could as I watched the truck get closer and closer to me. My laptop, in its aluminum case slid off my lap as the truck’s bumper and then huge front tire passed within an inch of the front of my chair while its rear wheels narrowly missed my laptop. The driver of the vehicle didn’t even see me and carried on his way unaware of his carelessness. The minivan driver jumped out with eyes wide and asked me if I was ok. Stunned yes, but nevertheless ok. My uber laptop case had done it’s job well. Everything was intact!
Almost getting squished provided a rather concentrated opportunity to reflect on the progress of my life. I’ve been feeling like the time is ripe to be moving on from Elastic Path. I don’t feel that it is a responsible use of my life energy to keep subjecting myself to work that I am not passionate about and feel increasingly conflicted about. I have such a strong longing to go much deeper into my spiritual life balanced with creating solutions that alleviate suffering and unconsciousness on the planet. I think I must cut the golden handcuffs and free myself of the perceived security that my job provides if I am going to make any progress in the areas of my life that really matter to me.
Caroline Myss talks in Advanced Energy Anatomy about how our attachments to the past and the familiar can slow down the manifestation of our hopes and dreams. I am feeling the pressure of the pull of my destiny and the seductive pull of complacency, as I struggle to trust that I will be ok as I let go of the familiar. My good friend an astrologer has suggested that April is ideal time to move on – stay tuned.
peace be with you